Reflection, Experiences & Health

Covid 19 has really shaken humanity up right? Sometimes through the deepest pain, comes the greatest learning lessons. This virus has done many things, affected everyone’s life in some way or another BUT it has also done one thing that most of us haven’t noticed… It’s given us time for reflection. Everyone has had (or is having) a different experience over the course of this virus and to opposite extremes of the scale. Reflection for some may be an in your face type deal right now or it could be blocked in this moment through the trauma of your thoughts or experiences. But I’d like, for a minute, to focus attention on this time for reflection and what it could mean for you and your health. Remember that mindset will play a large part in your thoughts, attitudes and experiences. I’ll use my aha story as an example...

So my experience of the first lockdown started off great. We spent time together as a family, we made do with what we had at home to have fun and to save money we found ways to make our food stretch. We got creative and we had fun doing it. Unfortunately (or fortunately) at the end of lockdown 1, I was diagnosed with early stage breast cancer. The fact that I found out when I did (I believe) was to my advantage because I was so incredibly grateful it had been caught early and hadn’t happened during lockdown. I truly believe that because I was approaching this challenge with a grateful mindset that my surgery and treatment happened like clockwork. Don’t get me wrong, I was shitting myself at the beginning and the “treatment” was hideous, but my awareness training kicked in and I just focused. I dealt with my wellness while my doctors dealt with my “illness”. Wellness and dis-ease are directly related to not only genetics but lifestyle choices as well. I heard the phrase “Genetics load the gun, lifestyle pulls the trigger” today and it got me thinking about the trigger for this breast cancer. So bare with me, there is a point to this backstory.

As a child, I grew up with the perception of maternal abandonment issues both emotionally and physically. As I grew up I believed I had to work harder than anyone else just to be accepted and loved. I developed a really harsh opinion of myself if I upset anyone or got “it” wrong. I had to do everything perfectly and if it wasn’t, I would beat myself up. When I started a family, I vowed that I would protect our children from what I perceived were my experiences growing up. Well about a year ago, something happened with my youngest child and her friend which triggered all of the emotions that had been buried deep. I remember at the time I shut down, (we call it being switched in Body Talk). For the first time ever I couldn’t speak, I couldn’t think and then the barrage of thoughts of what a shit mum I was took over. I had such a deep seated subconscious belief about myself and this was possibly one of those "lifestyle triggers".

When we work with the breasts, holistically, it can allude to many things maternal. The breasts may represent femininity, nourishment, taking care of others or the self and because it was on my right side (or yin - feminine side), I could see a pattern starting to emerge. I obviously had buried active memories of prominent females in my life where those emotions attached to a memory that had resurfaced due to this incident. It brought up deep grieving feelings of not being good enough, as a person and as a mum. Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t go around consciously feeling like this. This is all about acknowledging an awareness of a pattern that may have contributed as part of the underlying cause of this breast cancer diagnosis - this is just that “lifestyle pulling the trigger bit”.

But this wasn’t the only possible trigger, I was never good at consciously eating, I would miss meals, not drink enough water or get enough nutrients to help my body run at an optimal level, though I exercised a lot. As a teen and in my early 20s I’d be smoking and drinking cause it was the cool thing to do (again trying to fit in without realising it). On top of that, eating foods that, if I'd listened to my body as I ate them, were inflaming foods for me (I’d feel incredibly tired after having them) and a whole lot of other possible environmental stuff.

Do you see what I’m saying? There are loads of factors to take into consideration when we get a diagnosis and there are ways to keep yourself healthy if you have the right knowledge and tools. Symptoms don’t just happen overnight, and everyone’s story will be different (even with the same diagnosis). They say it takes around 15 - 20 years for the abuse of your body to start showing up. My body was trying to tell me to clean myself up, get rid of the toxic emotional shit and start eating better, thinking better. I also organically know now that I need to put that spotlight of attention on my belief system and weed out the ones that just don’t serve me anymore. Of course I’m good enough, we all are. We just need to retrain our minds to believe it.

Now… the cool thing that led on from this was I sat up and started taking notice of my thoughts. I'm not embarrassed to admit that I became aware that I had allowed myself to become a victim of my own thoughts, I had been hanging onto the past for dear life without knowing it. My body in all it’s overweight glory has been trying to protect itself from ghosts of the past and possible villains of the future. Weight and skin issues are very much linked to protection. Who knew?! Well I kinda did... Gees I love this work!!

So the point of all this? It’s time to slow the f!#k down, listen to your body. What is it trying to tell you? Are you tired? Are your muscles sore? Do you push through and just get on with it? I shared part of my story as an example of not paying attention to what my body and mind had been trying to tell me and how it got my attention. This isn't about the diagnosis, it's about listening to the signals because your body is talking to you 24/7. You don’t have to wait for something big to come along to get your attention, listen to your body now. If you’re tight, stretch, If you’re tired go to bed earlier, if you’re mentally fatigued go for a walk or take a relaxing bath - whatever floats your boat and relaxes you. Now is the time to do this.

Most of us have underlying stress buzzing away in the background due to everyday life. Because whether you believe the world is crazy and fast paced you’re right.. If you believe the world is chilled and peaceful, you’re also right. You don’t need to be an expert, you just need to observe without any judgement. Again, just observe without judgment, be gentle with yourself because when you know better you do better.

Understand that staying well is more than just diet and exercise. It’s the stories you tell yourself in your mind, it’s the food and fluids you put in your mouth, it’s the environmental toxins whether they be EMF’s from the wifi/electronics, chemicals or the people that surround you in your life, it’s the mindset you have that creates a filter of how you see the world, positive or negative. Every single aspect of your life has brought your health to where it is today. Mindfulness, Meditation, Reiki, Body Talk, Talk Therapy and countless other modalities are a great way to help calm the mind so you can begin your journey inwards. AND, if it all becomes too much, reach out and ask for help. Vulnerability is courage, we all need a helping hand once in a while. You’re braver than you know and stronger than you think. The world is a better place for having you in it so look after you, because you deserve it.

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